Who da thunk?
Koch
Brothers Consider Purchasing First Democrat
By Andy
Borowitz
WICHITA (The Borowitz
Report)—Charles and David Koch, the billionaire industrialists who have
spent decades acquiring a world-class collection of Republicans, revealed over
the weekend that they are considering purchasing their first
Democrat.“We’ve always bought Republicans, and our father bought Republicans before us,” Charles, the elder Koch, said. “They’re bred to be obedient, and they respond to simple commands.”
He said that he and his brother had considered acquiring a Democrat only after determining that none of the Republicans on offer this year was worth adding to their collection.
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